Pretty Pictures.

We are all 50 shades

After hearing all the hype about Fifty Shades of Grey, I simply had to read it. I've gotten through the first book of the trilogy and I have to admit the writing is quite, quite good. I particularly like the character development.  At one point, the hero - Christian Grey states that he is, "Fifty shades of fucked up." For some reason I like this like, despite Christian's horrendous childhood, I can't help but wonder if he's not totally alone in being "fifty shades of fucked up." So I starting thinking of my own life and I'm not sure I'm FIFTY shades, but I am quite a few, but, like Christian, not all of which I want to admit, let alone admit on the internet! Still, I'm cool with admitting to a few - so here's a brief list.

1.  Panic attacks. Sometimes I get panic attacks and seriously believe that someone I know is or will be in danger.

2.  Overwhelming sadness. Once in a while I am besieged with an overwhelming feeling of sadness and it seems that all the pain and agony I have ever felt resurfaces and I relive every wound, every terror.

3.  Money.  Seriously, I'm doing okay. I'm far from rich, but I can certainly take care of myself, but I well remember a time when I could barely support my family, so I tend to grab any extra job that comes my way even though I don't really NEED the money, thereby stealing precious time from doing the things I want to do.

4.  Cutting.  Yep. I used to be a cutter.  Emphasis on the word USED. I'm happy to say it has been a very long time since I have been tempted to, let alone actually, cut.

So - anyone else fucked up and willing to share?

Weekend Away (fiction) part 3

True to his word, once my bowels were good and clean and I was a quiver mass of anticipation, Steven placed me on the bed, a wedge pillow beneath my hips.  On one had, this is a humiliating position - my ass in the air, fully exposed and open. On the other hand - this is a terribly exciting position to be - my ass in the air, fully available for his pleasure!
"Ready?" he asked.
"Yes," I begged. "Please, yes."
He laughed at my need.
"Almost," he whispered.
He too my hands and bound them with a silken cord, allowing about six inches between then.  Next, (he had been busy while I was in the bathroom!) he attached my bindings to a rope which ran all the way beneath the mattress. I sighed with contentment.  I was not bound to the bed and completely at his mercy.
"Now you are read."
With that, I felt a coldness enter my anus - lube.  I closed my eyes, anticipating his entry. Thankfully, I didn't wait long. A mere moment later, I felt the tip of his penis press against my anxious hole.  Steven was quite a big man, but thanks to his careful preparation, his manhood found a welcome home with very little resistance.  Still, I gasped at the size of him invading my most private space. Then, then I felt it. He was fully inside of me and my mind went blank. My body and his pleasure were the world. Stars and color bust as the first orgasm quivered through my body.  Panting, I barely heard Steve chuckle as he began to fuck my ass.
"That's my girl," he encouraged.
He continued to pump in and out of me, his hands beneath me, fondling my nipples.
"God!" I heard him shout and he too shot a load of hot pleasure deep inside of me, setting off my second wave of joy.
He collapsed on top of me, gently kissing my neck. After a few minutes, he pulled out of me and I moaned, feeling the loss of him.
"Don't worry, babe. Remember, I said your holes would be full this entire weekend, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did," I answered as he re-plugged my tender anus. Life rarely gets better than this.

Weekend Maintenance part 2

By the time Steven had administered my 25 hard punishment swats my ass cheeks stung and I had begun to tear up a bit. I was also in full on submissive mode.  No longer was I an accountant.  No longer was I cocky or edgy.  I was aware only of him and my desire to please him.  The entire universe resided in that plush hotel room and I was nothing more than a willing, obedient servant of the Master of All.
"Good.  No tears yet.  Time enough for those later. Now," he instructed as he gently lifted me to the soft carpet, "you will sit right there for a moment while I arrange a few things."

"Yes," I quietly answered, my eyes lowered.  I watched as he opened his suitcase and removed a black silk scarf.  This was tied around my eyes, effectively blinding me.  I now could only hear his movements and wonder. Within a few moments, he helped me to stand and walked me into the bathroom.

Once there, he led me into the shower and placed my hands against the back wall, which apparently was tiled.  He kicked my feet apart and back, so that I was "in position".  Next,, he slowly walked my hands down the wall so that I was bent over, my ass in the air. I felt him wiggle the butt plug and sighed with relief.  The plug had been inside of me for well over 2 hours and my tight little hole was quite tender.  My relief, however, was short lived. Within moments, I felt the short, hard tube of an enema bag being inserted and cold water begin to fill my bowel. I whimpered, humiliated.  Just when I felt like I would burst, he flow stopped.  He swiftly pulled out the tube and just as swiftly replaced it with the plug. I couldn't help myself. I began to cry.

"That's it. Now is the time to cry.  I'm going to leave for a time.  You will remain here, just like this, until I return.  Understand?" he asked.

"But, Sir. . .," I began.


He delivered one sharp slap to my pussy and I cried out in pain.

"Yes, Sir.  I understand."

"That's better.  When I return you will be allowed to remove the plug and empty your bowels.  We will repeat this process 3 times just to be sure you're good and clean.  Then, do you know what will happen to you, my little tramp?"

"No, Sir," I whispered, not sure if I was more excited or terrified.

"I am going to fuck your little ass," he answered.

I sighed with relief.  I'd finally have his glorious cock inside of me.

"Thank you, Sir."

Experiment

So this morning, after gazing into my desolate fridge, I decided the grocery fairies were busy elsewhere and I'd have to venture out myself. Now being a Mid-West girl, I've always been something of a carnivore, even though I do love vegetables! Today, though, as I was perusing the aisle of my local Whole Foods meat section I kept seeing sad furry little faces looking back at me in an accusatory manner where I once saw slabs of delectable morsels of tender flavor. Therefore, I've decided to  experiment with vegetarianism.  I don't want to go all crazy vegan (not that vegans are crazy, but I'd just prefer to step into the shallows as opposed to dive into the depths), so I'm still just fine with dairy, eggs and fish. As you all well know, I'm also a fairly proficient cook, but I've never really used tofu or veggies as the main event. Sooooo - all that being said - I could us some help. If any of you have tips or links or recipes that you'd be willing to share, I'd be forever grateful!

Wish me luck!

Weekend Maintenance

I've been edgy lately. Work is a bitch and going to be getting even bitchier soon. Home is a bitch - repairs, breakages, cleaning - It just never ends. I have been crabby, surly and suffering from tension headaches. I'm tired of thinking, managing and working. It didn't help that this morning, my car didn't start and Steven had to take me to work so he could figure out what the hell was wrong with my car. Finally, quitting time arrived and as I walked out of the building, I saw Steven sitting with the top down in his convertible wearing a grin which boded no good.
 "How was your day," he asked.
"Crappy. What's going on?" I questioned.
"We are going for a little weekend adventure," he answered.  "Starting this minute you will behave as my little sex slave. If you are good, rewards will follow, but if you are bad, punishments will be delivered without mercy."
Now we'd had weekends like this before, and I LOVED them, but we'd always planned them together.
"But I haven't packed anything! WhereB are we going? What about my dog?"
"Shhhh. It's all taken care of. And by the way, I rigged your car so it wouldn't start this morning," he grinned triumphantly.
"Oh, god."
"First rule - no underclothing. Take off the panties and bra," he ordered.
"But the top's down! People will see!" I complained.
"Now that's cause for your first punishment. 25 hand spankings I'd say."
I shut my mouth, sure that he'd follow through. Luckily, we were well away from my work, so I wiggled my behind enough to tug off my panties.  Thank goodness I'd worn a dress today!  Next, I reached around to unhook my bra and slide the straps down my arms. Every girl know how to take off a bra without undressing.
"Good. Now, toss them out of the car," he said.
I gasped and started to complain, but he shot me a look and I obeyed.
"Open the glove box and you'll find your supplies."
I did as he told me and found a tube of lube and a small butt plug.
"Really?" I whined.
"Yep," he answered. "Put that in. It comes out when I say it does."
I hated this. I hated wearing the plug in public - even the car - and I hated putting it in myself. He knew this, the demonic bastard, which is exactly why he was making do it. He knew I hated it but he also knew I loved pleasing him.
So, I did it.
He grunted his approval and continued to drive - for 2 hours! Finally, we pulled up in front of a lush hotel. Steven parked the car, closed the roof, helped me out and retrieved a small suitcase from the trunk. I was very conscious of the plug in my ass with no underwear and terrified it would fall out, so I walked oddly, trying to keep my cheeks squeezed together.  Steven chuckled a bit, knowing exactly the embarrassment I was feeling.
Luckily, we registered and got to the room without mishap. As soon as we walked into the luscious suite, Steven commanded me to strip.
I did.
"You will remain naked this entire weekend," he explained. You will not leave this room nor will you wear any clothing until we check out. Understand?"
"Yes."
"Good. Now, I believe your first punishment is in order."
I smiled as I positioned myself over his lap and felt the first stinging blows of his hand.
This was EXACTLY what I had been needing.

Bad Girl, Bad!

Seriously, I haven't posted since January!!! I've been very, very bad and really should be punished for such irresponsible behavior!!

Suggestions????

Grateful Service

I knelt before him. His body could not have been more beautiful or hard if it had been carved from cold marble. It was anything but cold, though. His heat and scent infused my senses. His hand in my hair a sensuous pleasure. I turned my face and pressed my cheek into his palm, looking up into his liquid brown eyes. He smiled and I melted. Gently, hesitantly, I cradled his jewels and kissed the tip of his shaft. He sighed and I was pleased. I licked around the head and up and down his shaft tasting his skin while caressing his balls. He gripped my hair a with a bit more force and I wrapped my lips around his head, slowly sinking. Slowly adding pressure with my tongue. Going down until I felt the tender place where rod meets cushions. I stayed for a moment, massaging his length with my tongue. Finally, I moved both hands and head - sucking, caressing, worshiping his manhood and his beauty. I could stay like this forever - kneeling before him, his flesh filling my mouth. I feel his breathing quicken and his hands grasp my hair almost painfully. I know he's close. I push down, feeling him expand even more, his tip touching the back of my throat. I contract my tongue, pressing his length against the roof of my mouth. His burning essence shoots down my throat, searing it with his taste. I moan joyfully. He relaxes his grip on my hair and sighs. I know I've pleased him, but I'm not finished. Just because he's shrinking doesn't mean his cock needs less attention. So I continue, very gently now, to lick and suck and clean every drop from him. His taste more satisfying than the sweetest fruit.
 I kiss his balls, his thighs, his lower stomach and then attend, once again, to his satisfied cock, praying that perhaps, when he's hard once again, he'll grace my cunt, dripping with honey, with it's presence. 

Journals of a Domestic - 2

First off, let me say that I have never been happier in my life! Sir Steffen has put me in charge of reorganizing his impressive library - which is one holy mess! Since he's a professor of history, this truly is a labour of love for me! I simply adore the smell of the old books, the hard backed covers, the vast amounts of knowledge hidden within the tomes.

My position, however, requires that I not only perform domestic duties, but also that I please Sir Steffen in any way he chooses. Considering he's the hottest man I've ever met, gentle while still firm, appreciative and polite, this is also a labour of love! He's also been quite clear that he can and will take NO for an answer and respect whatever limits I choose to impose.  Like I said - polite! A few days ago he sat me down and went over a list of things that would please him. A few things on that list jumped out at me - one was Anal sex/training. He saw my fear and asked about it.  When I told him I had tried it once with horrible results, he just nodded for me to continue.  I couldn't believe that I was actually admitting that I have always wanted to try anal, but didn't think I was able to based on that first time.

Now - he's training my ass and I LOVE IT!!! Right after this conversation, which was in the library, he opened up a locked drawer in his desk. My eyes had to have about popped out of my head! There, lined up all nice and neat, were 4 anal plugs ranging from about the size of a man's thumb to Holy Fuck big.  He told me to bend over the desk, which I did, naturally, despite a bit of apprehension.  He caressed my ass and I felt something cold and slick go into my anus. I jumped about a mile and he laughed a bit and told me it was just a bit of lube. Then, slowly, he began to insert the smallest plug. I tensed up, but when he started fingering my clit as well, I relaxed and became quite excited. Before I knew it, I climaxed. Sir then kissed the back of my neck, helped me stand up and handed me a black thong. He told me that the thong would help hold the plug in place and I was to wear it until he told me otherwise. He then gave my ass a sweet swat and told me to continue my work.

The plug was amazing. It moved with every one of my movements, reminding me of my duel purpose. I've never felt so sexy in my life! Today, Sir told me, he was going to move up to the next larger plug.

I love my life.

Journals of a Domestic

I've always liked to read fiction written in the style of a personal journal, so I'm thinking about doing a series of journal-type entries which could, eventually, be joined together into a full length book. Keep in mind, this is FICTION, just written from the first person point of view. Naturally, some of my own experiences, research,  and knowledge goes into all of my stories, but generally, it's about 80% made-up fun.

So, if you'd be so kind, dear reader, after you have finished this short "Journal" entry, please leave a comment and let me know what you think.


December 27, 1991

This is only my second day at my new job and I gotta say - it's kind of scary. I knew what I was signing on for, at least I thought I did, but now I'm questioning my decision.  Still, I signed a contract and I'll honor my word. Besides, Sir Steffen has stated over and over again that if he requests something I truly don't want to do, I don't have to. He will simply release me from my contract with no hard feelings.

You see, this all started because I couldn't get a job. Times are tough for a 22 year old woman with a useless degree in Anthropology.  I've got a trust fund, so I don't really need money, but I've got too much pride to sponge off of that. So, I took this job as a "domestic" for Sir Steffen.
 Here's the low-down and dirty of the job.

1. The Uniform.  I am to wear black pumps (3 inch heels) with a lovely ankle strap and a short - very short - black, sleeveless dress which is quite form fitting but also very soft and comfortable. I am not allowed underclothing of any kind unless I'm on the rag, the I must use tampons and wear a g-string. I also wear soft leather bracelets which have small rings attached to their clasps.

2. Appearance.  I am to wear a modest amount of make-up daily, my long, brown hair pulled back in a high ponytail, and keep my legs, pits and pubic area free from all hair. I can do this by waxing, shaving, or depilatories.

3.  Room.  I was given a small room which is completely mine. In it is a single bed, a dresser and an attached bathroom complete with tub, shower, toilet and sink.

4.  Duties.  I will serve all meals to Sir Steffen and any guests. Further,  keep my own room and bathroom impeccably tidy as well as Sir Steffen's library - which is impressive! - neat, orderly and categorized.  I have also agreed to any and all training - mental, physical or sexual - which Sir Steffen deems necessary for me.

5.  Compensation.  Room, board, full medical benefits, clothing of Sir Steffen's choice, and an allowance of $100.00 a week.

I'm not stupid here. Sir Steffen made himself VERY clear. He is a Dominant fond of  having pretty, submissive women around him. I will be expected to perform sexually for him and he, in turn, will most likely punish me by (according to him) spanking, nipple torture, plugging, gagging, humiliation, or any other means I agree to. In fact, I've already screwed up and paid the price.

This morning, anxious to be on time to serve breakfast, I forgot to put on my make-up - just some lip gloss, a bit of blusher, a dash of eye shadow and a touch of mascara. Not much at all, but I just plumb forgot! As I was pouring Sir's coffee, he looked up at me and sighed. Right away my heart dropped and I knew my mistake. My hand shook, but I managed to keep from spilling the coffee.
With him staring at me, I replaced the pot on the sideboard and stood before him with my hands crossed in front of me, my head down shamefully.

When he told me I had disappointed him, I died a little inside. I have no idea why I want to please this man so much, but I do. Anyway, he also assured me that he understood my mistake was due to the fact that I was new and still learning the ropes - so to speak - of working for him. Still, I needed to be taught that purposeful failure was not an option and would be immediately punished. I nodded and assured him that I understood and would be grateful for his correction.

He scooted his chair away from the table and told me to lie across his lap. I'm so proud of myself for not even hesitating.  This must have pleased him too, because when I was in position, he gave my ass a sweet little pat and murmured something that sounding like "that's a good girl."

After that, though, there was nothing sweet or little. He brought his hand down with a wallop that had me wimpering in no time at all! He ignored my cries and continued to spank me until my ass was ON FIRE!!! Still, I didn't struggle away from him, I just cried and hollered a bit. Finally, he stopped. He just let me cry a little while longer, while her rubbed my back and I calmed down, then he helped me stand. He then told me to go upstairs, put on my make-up and continue with my duties.

Let me tell you - I scurried to do just that. My bottom burned most of the day and when I glanced in a mirror, I saw it was as red as it was hot. The shocking part, I was so aroused I damned near orgasmed!!! I mean, my pussy was positively dripping and my thighs were wet all day, especially when, just before bed, Sir had me lift my skirt so he could check my ass. He said he was quite pleased with the way I had conducted myself then, THEN, he swiped one finger across my slit! I jumped about 10 feet in the air and felt myself juicing again! Sir just laughed, slapped my ass once more, told me I was going to fit in just fine, and to get to bed since tomorrow was another full day.

Tomorrow. I can't wait to see what that brings!